Being Seen

Yesterday at the school I had one of those days where everything you do rubs someone the wrong way and everything you say come’s out  exactly not how you meant it. I was feeling like I wanted crawl into a cozy little box and hide myself away, wondering why I chose to come out of five years of hermit-ing in the first place. I felt raw and open and all I wanted to do was become invisible. Then I wrote this to myself this morning. I think some of you might relate, so I’m sharing it.

…I want to be seen. I do not want to be invisible. I want my work to be seen. A big part of being seen is the fear that you will not be liked or are not good enough. I am going to be brave and take the hits because some people will like what you do and will encourage you and others will be all flustered by your very life force and existence. You will get in peoples way, they will get in your way, you will be misunderstood, you will misunderstand, you will take things personally, you will not understand important things, you will understand other important things. You will be seen, and felt and there in the world bumping up against all the other people that are also there in the world bumping up against you. It’s alright to retreat, to take a breather as you get used to all this bumping into things and being bumped into. It’s alright to let it go – but do not wish again that you might be invisible in the world or that somehow if people see you they will see your wrong. Be SEEN in the world – it is the only way for an artist and a poet to even have half a chance at an audience and to find some camaraderie with even a small handful of fellow creators. You must be seen and be o.k. with all the awkwardness of being seen, because it is only in being seen that your heart will be known and an artist and a poet wants more than anything in the world to have their heart be known. Get used to being seen.

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